Acid Heroes

June 19, 2009

Conversation: Ace Backwords and Juan Leggit

Filed under: Conversations — Ace Backwords @ 3:40 am
Tags: , , , , ,

Go straight to the buy-it page

front cover

Great book. But I would take the C-word out. That one is gonna cost you.

Yeah, I kinda’ regret the c-word thing. It’s not like I’m making a grand point or anything. It was just an offhand remark.
That last epilogue was something I just threw in there at the last minute the day before the book went to the presses. I just figured that the book started when I was born, so it should end right now in the present moment where I ended up. So I threw in a journal entry from a couple days earlier that I hadn’t even intended to publish when I wrote it. So a lot of this stuff, you really don’t think through all the reactions people will have to what you say. When you’re writing for thousands of people its impossible to figure out how people will react. You can play it really safe, but there’s a danger to that too. I guess I’d rather be offensive than bland.

I wonder if your assessment of R. Crumb would have been different if he never answered your letters.

No of course not. If Crumb hadn’t answered my letters and been an appreciator of my artwork, I would have considered him a no-talent bum with no proper discernment of artistic talent. ‘Course the fact that he would even listen to my ravings shows he suffers from deep mental illness.

Why is it that you completely leave out friends that have loved you over a long stretch of the time you talk about?

I’ve known Duncan for over 30 years, and he don’t get a mention in Acid Heroes either. This was, technically, one of the most difficult projects I ever attempted. It was like amassing thousands of hours of footage for a documentary film and then having to edit it down to an hour movie. It rushes through 50 years of my life in 300 pages. Along with all the bios of the acid heroes. And deals with 50 years of America’s cultural history: the ’50s, the ’60s, the ’70s, the ’80s, the ’90s, and even the ’00s. So I had to fly through the material and cut out 95% of it. It was a VERY demanding edit job. Course Nikki, Katie and English Tracey might be pissed at how I caricatured them. I just show one side of their character, like a cartoon character almost, because I don’t have time to go into depth about anything. But who knows. Do you think the portrayal did them justice? Was it accurate? Could you recognize them in how I described them?

It was very easy to pick out your barely disguised characters. I too had a crush on our little Katie (WHO DIDN’T !) and secretly hated ol’ Daveyboy for the ease he had with women. But I couldn’t help but love the guy as a fun and happy-go-lucky friend. I wasn’t commenting on not, somehow, being included, but on your portrayal as being unloved. More people love you than the average “putz” and I remember a few chicks throwing themselves at you and only now have come to understand that you were Too Fried On Acid To Realize It. I was happy to see that one thing I said to you did make it in your book. I was beginning to think you haven’t ever heard a word I said in all these years.

Yeah, I know what you’re saying. But you know how it is. “Nobody loves you when you’re down and out.” I was reading an account about John Lennon during his Lost Weekend period. He went completely berserk in a drug-and-alcohol fueled rage, smashed and tore apart everything he could get his hands on, all the while screaming over and over: “NOBODY LOVES ME! EVERYBODY JUST USES ME!” And this was a guy who was beloved my millions. So I think everyone feels that way to some degree. Some nights when I was crawling up to my lonely crash-spot in the hills, my face covered with Shingles sores, my head and my body aching, its easy to feel that you’re all alone with your pain, you live and die alone, and nobody REALLY cares. Even as people do care. I certainly appreciate all you’ve done for me over the years, buddy.
Nikki really hit the nail on the head. You gotta love yourself. If you don’t love yourself, then all the love you get from other people just sort of bounces off your forehead. Doesn’t really penetrate.

R. Crumb’s assertion that there was somehow this race of the worthies (Pioneers) at the start and all others had bad dope and dubious qualifications, is a little elitist, if you ask me.

I don’t remember Crumb’s comment. You think I waste much time listening to his babble? He’s worse than Duncan, ya know? You get Duncan on a spanking jag and he’ll talk your ear off for HOURS about “blistering red buttocks.” Crumb’s even worse, he’ll go on forever about “rock hard Jewish buttocks, like two firm basketballs that you can really pound… “

But who’s asking?

Who’s answering? It’s a mystery, always. Who the hell are we anyways?

All in all a very good and entertaining read, a few irritating typos, and like I said that C-word is always trouble. But anyone that makes their bread in the media and picks a fight with the Jews should have no problem handling that.



  1. check out my LSD Documentary film posted here in four parts

    power and control: LSD in the 60’s

    Comment by aron ranen — June 25, 2009 @ 4:58 pm | Reply

  2. New Year’s Eve 2013 lonely lonely lonely! no hope !no hope !no hope !to spare despair! despair!/ I’m glad I’m feeling better/:;($)@&(6)

    Comment by Head for the hills — January 1, 2014 @ 6:33 am | Reply

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