Acid Heroes

April 19, 2011

God. Who the Heck is that Dude?

Filed under: Backwords from Ace — Ace Backwords @ 6:52 pm
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“Some Theological Shit” from Rev. Ace Backwords

Sometimes I wonder what it must be like to be God. To be omniscient. To know everything. To know the past and the future all the way to the end of time. And probably several minutes after that.

I can’t help wondering about God’s motives. Why He did this. Why He created this weird universe and all (plus human beings — weird critter that we are).

Christianity is somewhat sketchy in this regard. As if they’re afraid to question the motives of God. “Silence before the great and powerful Oz!” Like God might smite us if we start poking into His business. I mean, the Bible says that God created the heavens and the earth in seven days. But they really don’t go into detail as to why He did it.

According to the Bible, God set it up as some kind of test for humanity. He gave Adam and Eve everything they needed with one provision: Don’t do THIS. Don’t eat the goddamn apple. To test them, I guess. To see if they’d try and pull any shit when God’s back was turned and He wasn’t looking. Of course, Adam and Eve failed the test. And the penalty was that they were expelled from the Garden permanently. With one way to get back in: Saying the right magic word (Jesus, etc). Or believing in the one right path. Which leads to salvation and a return to heavenly bliss.

So it’s a test. And God is a very harsh scorer. You make one little mistake and you’re banished to Hell.

But it still doesn’t explain why God did this. Why He put us humans through these tortures in the first place.

Of course the Vedanta concept explained it for me. Somewhat. God’s doing a hide-and-seek game. For kicks. Cosmic kicks. I mean God experiences His eternal glory all the time. Which I suppose gets a little boring and stuffy after a while. So what better kick for God than to down-grade. To put blinders on Himself and experience mortal, stupid life as all of us mortal, stupid critters.

Of course all the fundamentalist Christians, Muslims, Jews, etc make the same mistake: That they are all special followers of the one true God (all the rest of you can eat dirt). Pretty obnoxious. “My God is better than your God.”

The mystics on the other hand maintain that God flows through all people equally.

Of course I go through periods where I feel: “I’m a highly evolved person spiritually, so God should be on my side.” Unfortunately God has not been cooperating with this premise.

I suppose megalomania is a form of thinking: “I’m God’s chosen person!” Often without checking with God first. To back up their credentials.

With the would-be messiahs it’s usually a case of “a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.”

With me, I always felt: If people could learn anything from me it’s from my mistakes. That saved me from playing The Great Know-It-All. A very tough role to play. I figured: I’d start out as the fool and try and work my way up from there.

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