Acid Heroes

April 23, 2011

“Jesus is Satan”

Filed under: Backwords from Ace,Random Archives — Ace Backwords @ 7:15 pm
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(Originally published August 1, 2005)

You see it all hanging out on a street corner. There’s this guy who’s been setting up his vending table across from ours. He’s a big, dark-skinned Pakistani guy. He’s a pretty nice guy, soft-spoken, congenial and friendly. But at his vending table he’s selling a beautifully-printed, self-published book entitled “JESUS IS SATAN.” The full-color cover illustration shows Jesus on the cross with Satanic horns coming out of his head.

To advertise his book, he has a big sign at his vending table that says: “JESUS’ MOTHER WAS A WHORE!” Well, that gets their attention. The vendor hadn’t been around for a few months, but he showed up again yesterday with his stand. I noticed that his front teeth were missing. I’m sure there’s a story behind that, but I didn’t bother to ask him. Instead I asked him: “What do you get out of doing this?”

“I want to make people think,” he explained. That can be a dangerous thing, considering the process that passes for “thinking” in most people’s brains. In truth, most people (including me) don’t “think.” We “regurgitate.” Often someone will come up to me and breathlessly explain to me — in some detail — their latest theories regarding politics, world affairs, or religion. Usually “their” thoughts are just a regurgitation of something they heard on a very exciting television show. Usually, ten seconds into their spiel, I already can predict exactly where their steamed-up little minds are going. It’s like listening to someone tell a 20-minute joke when you’ve guessed the punchline within the first 10 seconds. Fortunately, all they demand of you, the listener, is the response: “Yes, that certainly is a brilliant and original observation on politics, world affairs, and/or religion, and you are surely a bright and astute fellow.” That invariably satisfies them.

Anyway, yesterday, these three teenage black chicks (and very cute I might add) took umbrage with the vendor and his “JESUS IS SATAN” book.

“You’re goin’ to hell, you motherfuckin’ punk-ass bitch!” exclaimed one.

“I should kick your motherfuckin’ ass right now!” exclaimed another.

“You shouldn’t be talking no motherfuckin’ shit about Jesus Christ!” exclaimed the other.

The three black chicks stood there, screaming and threatening and having this  motherfuckin’ theological discussion  for about 20 minutes, until they finally stormed off in a huff.

But I still couldn’t help wondering about the vendor’s motives. Was it that he didn’t get enough attention as a child, and now he was making up for lost time? And of course, I wondered about my own motives, having spent 30 years pushing my own alleged “thinking” — much of which flies in the face of the commonly-accepted wisdom — out at the world at large.  It is a strange thing: this relationship that all of us lonely, individual souls have with the World Out There.

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3 Comments »

  1. Why should he be seeking attention, whereas if you put up a table to tell people about a more orthodox view about Jesus, then your not seeking attention.

    There is actually a lot to support his arguing:
    1. The book of Genesis gives the tale of Satan telling Adam, he will not die, but be like God instead.
    Jesus tells People that he has conquered death and they will not die, but be like God.
    2. God rested on the 7th day.
    Mankind was created ont he 6th day, Adam and Even on 7th.
    3. God gave his people the LAND between Euphrat and Nile
    Jesus will end ‘heaven and earth’, and so make the fulfillment of God’s promise impossible.
    4. Jesus is a priest in the order of Melchizedek, which is a Priest of Moloch, burning all with fire.
    Jesus claims to have all authority God has and that heaven (which is God’s presence) will end,
    but not Jesus’ words.
    5. Yet Jesus claims that his world is not of this earth (based on the above) at the beginning in the
    desert and before his that before Pontius Pilate, suggesting he had no authority to fight for the
    earth. Basically the same claim, the earth not worth saving, yet he claims to be its saviour.
    6. Jesus lied to his followers regarding his quick return.
    7. Jesus lied to his apostles and did not tell them all they needed, for which reason the apostles
    were confused after his death, even more so, when Jesus allegedly called another Apostle (PAUL)
    to do his work better, without any interference and against the authority Jesus claims to have
    given to the apostles.
    8. Jesus did not do any harm to any demon.
    9. Jesus continuously put his disciples on the wrong foot. Claiming that they would do bigger things
    at one time and at another that a disciple could never be more than his master.
    10. Jesus did not fulfil the Jewish Law by being ‘the lamb that takes away the sins of the world’, because
    the Jewish says that it is a goat which takes away the sins of the world. (Hence Jesus is the goat)
    11. John the Baptist was correct in assumning he had to expect another one, because the Jews were
    expecting two messiahs. Jesus crime is usurping both and letting John the Baptist die, without any
    help.
    12. Jesus lied about John the Baptist being Elias, because John the Baptist himself knew he wasn’t. Jesus
    did that so he could claim to be the rightful good messiah, whereas John the Baptist and his disciples
    knew he wasn’t.
    13. Jesus wants the destruction of heaven and earth so he can make it anew (without the creator God).
    14. Satan falls from heaven at his baptism by the hands of John the Baptist, from that moment Jesus
    thinks he has all authority in heaven and earth (as Satan thinks), whereas according to Peter the
    Apostle even after his death and resurrection Satan still was the lord of this world.
    15. From the beginning the church was confused and misguided and Jesus failed in every respect as also
    did the Church. The tree can be recognised from its fruits. Those fruits are bad and hence so is the
    original tree (Jesus) bad.
    16. The Jews are still waiting for the real Messiah to come, which is held up for 2000 years now, because
    the Church has many good people and is not 100% bad, but at some stage will be.
    The real Messiah will be called anti=Christ and the returning Jesus will try to destroy him. But
    Ezechiel as well as Jesaia reveal that the real anti-christ will burn himself out, that is Jesus
    that is.
    17. Jesus claims to be the MorningStar in Revelation, which always has been identified as Lucifer.
    18. Jesus actually claims to create a new heaven and earth somewhere else, and to destroy this earth,
    with only his followers as the elect.
    19. The Jews did not believe in Hell only in Life by following God’s law. According to Ezechiel at the
    end Satan will burn himself up and cease to exist and there will only be Life. The jews are not
    evil as the Gospel claims and have always been a positive contribution to the development of
    humanity. This is because Satan hates the jews, and therefor the earth and its history.
    20. Jesus is Satan is the key to understanding Revelation and the prophets. Jesus did not fulfill Jewish
    law at all if you look at it critically.
    21. Jesus is Gesus is 666 the number of a man who like Paul took the world by deception…
    22. Christians believe mistakenly that first the real Christ appears and then the anti-christ, but in
    reality for the real Christ to appear, it is necessary that the anti=Christ appears first, (Goat) to
    take away the sins of the world. Satan hence carries his own burden and therefor justice will be
    achieved…

    I could go on and on, every pages of the Bible shouts it out to you and you have been told that you have ears but do not hear…. I think there is a strong point for Jesus being Satan…

    Comment by alan — May 5, 2011 @ 10:33 am | Reply

  2. i have this book…..i dont feel that he is trying to make people angry or he didnt get no love from his mom as a kid, he has interesting points in this book and i can understand where he is coming.

    Comment by aluv — September 18, 2011 @ 6:33 pm | Reply

    • I never got a chance to read the book. And the guy seemed like a reasonable and thoughtful person. I was mostly referring to his big sign announcing “Jesus’s mother was a whore.” That’ll get some people’s attention, believe me.

      Comment by Ace Backwords — March 21, 2014 @ 3:10 am | Reply


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