Acid Heroes

April 21, 2014

Chelsea Clinton announces: “Satanic spawn from Hell shall soon walk amongst us”

Filed under: Backwords from Ace — Ace Backwords @ 8:29 pm
Tags: , , ,
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“She done got knocked up real good!”

Chelsea Clinton announced her pregnancy today.  According to a statement released by her press secretary, the pregnancy was the result of a coalition between a Democratic sperm joining with a Democratic egg. resulting in conception.  While the effect of the Clinton pregnancy on the 2104 mid-term elections is being hotly debated by political insiders, the latest polls indicated that there’s a 50% chance that the baby would be either a boy or a girl.  When reached for a comment, Bill Clinton blamed the Koch brothers for “corrupting the political process with their big money.”
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 The Clinton fetus has reportedly already begun negotiations with Washington DC lobbyists, PACS and special interest groups in anticipation of a possible presidential run in year 2052.
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Meanwhile, Chelsea Clinton’s husband and alleged impregnator, Marc Mezvinksy, testified under oath before Congress, and categorically stated:  “Yes, I did have sex with that woman.”
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