Hospital stories

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Fortunately I don’t have too many hospital stories.  But I remember one.

A couple years ago I went completely deaf in one ear for no apparent reason.  That freaked me out.  Because, among many other things, I’d have to mix my music in mono from now on.

I didn’t have any medical coverage.  So I went down to the county hospital where the poor people go.  Waited in the reception area for about 6 hours with all the other poor people, sweating it out the whole time.  Figuring I was going to have to get surgery.  Or maybe, even worse, there was no cure.

FINALLY I saw a nurse.  This big black babe who must have weighed about 300 pounds.  I told her my plight.  She immediately grabbed my head in this vice grip, this sort of half-nelson wrestling move.  And wedged her hand into my ear.  And she popped out this big chunk of hardened ear wax.  I was instantly healed.  The whole thing only took about 2 minutes.

I was so grateful, I wanted to give her a big kiss.


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