Dealing with street crazies

 

Tonight, this violent, psychotic lunatic at People’s Park has decided he hates me and wants to kill me. So that’s a drag.

This is the 2nd or 3rd time this has happened to me over the last 5 years. Where some psychotic lunatic decides he hates me and wants to kill me (did I mention there are a lot of certifiably insane people on the street scene?).

The weird thing is I don’t even KNOW this person. So I have no idea why he has fixated on me and gets in my face every time I step into People’s Park and let’s me know that he hates me and wants to kill me (I guess that’s why we call people like that “insane”).

My first impulse is to get in his face and shout “DUDE WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU???”

But that approach is usually counter-productive. Because he’s completely insane. So I doubt he has a coherent grasp of precisely what is wrong with him.

I will say: There is NO easy way to deal with these street crazies. But when you’re on the streets. You have to deal with them the best you can. You have no choice.

And you’re pretty much on your own.  The police generally don’t care if street people are beating the shit out of each other.

The thing I try to avoid is getting “macho.” And turning every challenge into a battle to the death.

My first impulse always is “OH YEAH??? I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS!!”

My second impulse usually is to flee like a coward.

So it’s tricky. To find that middle ground.

 

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Predictably, the story had an ugly epilogue.  Fortunately, it didn’t involve me.  It’s almost funny how this one ended up playing out.

The lunatic had been screaming and yelling all day threatening to kill people (including me). Around midnight he confronts these three street people who are hanging out in a doorway across the street from People’s Park

“DID YOU THROW THAT ROCK AT ME???!!!” he screamed.

“No,” they all said. “We’re just sitting here minding our own business.”

(Did I mention the lunatic is completely insane and delusional and hallucinating?)

So the lunatic attacks the three guys and they’re fighting and punching.

One of the guys is this equally crazy street person named Moonshine. He says. “I’m gonna’ go get a gun and settle this one way or another.”

So now the lunatic is in the middle of the street screaming “HE’S GOT A GUN!! HE’S GOT A GUN!!”

Now Moonshine is really pissed. He says:  “Now I can’t go to sleep. I gotta stay up all night long dealing with this lunatic that wants to attack me.”

So Moonshine walks over to the lunatic and confronts him in the middle of the street.  It is show-down time.  Moonshine says to him real matter-a-factly: “You wanna’ fight? Let’s fight right now. So I can get it over with and go to sleep!” (Moonshine LIKES to fight).

The lunatic wisely thinks better of it. Decides to go down the block and sleep on the sidewalk next to Hate Man.

And the next morning the lunatic wisely decided to leave the scene to avoid getting his ass shot up by Moonshine.

So the story had a happy ending.  At least for the moment.

Ha ha.

Life on ‘dese streets.

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