Three young women from France

Generally I like to think of myself as the “secret homeless.” Someone that doesn’t look or act homeless. And you would walk right by me and never guess I was homeless. Because I look normal just like YOU. You abnormal fucks. But I guess not tonight. Probably because I’m sitting on cardboard matting. And am wearing a heavy overcoat. And I’m wearing a ski-knit hat (classic homeless bum look).

So these three young woman that have been hanging out in the patio across from me suddenly approach me. And they’re bearing a bag of to-go food. As an offering to me. So I immediately can tell what the scenario is. These kindly do-gooders with their hearts in the right place want to offer this poor pathetic homeless bum some food.

Which is nice. I appreciate the gesture. But I’m already 20 pounds over-weight. And I don’t need the extra food.

“You like? You like?” says one of the women offering me the food.

“No. No. I’m fine,” I said. “I’m just sitting here charging my cellphone. But thank you very much.”

“We from France,” said the woman. “Don’t understand English.”

“Oh,” I said. “Thank you thank you. But no. No. I good.” I’m trying to simplify my communication.

“Oh oh,” she says.

“But thank you, thank you,” I said. “Gracious.” (I don’t know any French but figured they’d know that one). “You beautiful women. Thank you thank you.”

They smiled and started to leave 

“Ciao,” I said. Is that French? Close enough. They smiled and headed off.
Ha ha.

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