Last night was Halloween. What a trip. For the first time in my adult life I’m actually living in a normal house in a normal neighborhood surrounded by seemingly normal people. So I was thrilled with the idea, for the first time in my life, of having actual trick-or-treaters knocking on my door. So I bought several big bags of Snickers candybars to prepare for the big ocassion. I turned all the lights in my house on, and opened up all the shades to let everyone in the neighborhood know I was open for business.
Mostly for the last two months I’ve been holed up alone in my house, hiding from the world. Almost nobody in the neighborhood even knows I’m here. I spend most of my time shunted off in my bedroom in the back behind shaded windows, mostly just reading books by myself, getting drunk, and blabbing off to my Facebook friends every night. But tonight is my once-in-a-lifetime chance to actually experience a normal Halloween with kids in costumes and candy and all that.
Halloween was one of my favorite holidays as a kid, roving all over town for hours with my pals until we had so much candy in our sacks we could barely carry the things (no exaggeration). And one of my favorite memories is dumping all the loot all over my bed and organizing the candy in different groups. Chocolate bars there. Hard candy over there. Accursed apples over there. I even remember some of my costumes. One year my mom hand-sewed me a really cool Batman uniform. Another year I dressed up as a woman with a bleached blonde mop for hair (what can I say, I had issues). Another year I dressed up as a bum. Which turned out to be good training for my future.
So anyways, last night I’m all excited about Halloween and pacing back and forth in my livingroom. Finally around 6 o-clock I get a knock on my door. I open the door and its two young mothers with a young boy dressed like Spiderman and a little girl dressed like an angel. Just adorable! I gave them big hand fulls of Snickers. Then, after they left I turned all the lights out and pretended nobody was home for the rest of the evening. It freaked me out. I’m just not used to this normal stuff. I’m used to living in neighborhoods where if somebody knocks on your door at night you double-bolt the front door and look for a weapon.
I guess its gonna take me awhile to adjust to all this normal Mr Rogers Neighborhood kind of stuff. What the hell. At least I had a bunch of Snickers candybars left over for myself.
Ace Backwords is a former cartoonist, writer and semi-normal human being. He's been sleeping in the bushes in the Berkeley hills for the last ten years with his four feral cats, Moo Cat, Fatty, Mini Scaredy and Micro Scaredy. Future plans include growing old and dying. Preferably in that order.
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4 thoughts on “Have a very merry Halloween”
Congrats on finally getting off the streets. It’s nice having those four walls separating you from the predatory/ dangerous types out there.
Jesus, I know that feeling all too well. I am so glad that you are in a house now. The book that you did with John Hoffman was the thing that literally kept me alive and actually helped me get into that “normal” life thing. I am glad that you are getting a taste of that as well. Finally. The adjustment from survival mode to safe mode takes years, because it’s so easy to be paranoid about losing it all, but it’s worth it. Sending positive thoughts and enjoy your Snickers, man.
If it hadn’t been because your art inspired me, every time I saw it in the free newspaper, I probably would’ve never even noticed that book in the library. Dumpster diving was only the reason I was able to do my art when I hit rock bottom. It helped me get a shitty apartment and to feed myself until I was able to find opportunities that helped me get to where I am now. Had your art not crossed into my life, I’d probably be another dead hooker in 1998, rather than happily married with a house in the country and three cats in 2013.
Seriously, you have no idea how grateful I am to you, or how happy I am for this chapter of your life. I realize that you don’t know me, and I don’t know you. Yet, t I am glad that you were a part of my life thanks to your art. I have a feeling that I am not the only one who feels that way.
Acid Heroes 
Congrats on finally getting off the streets. It’s nice having those four walls separating you from the predatory/ dangerous types out there.
Jesus, I know that feeling all too well. I am so glad that you are in a house now. The book that you did with John Hoffman was the thing that literally kept me alive and actually helped me get into that “normal” life thing. I am glad that you are getting a taste of that as well. Finally. The adjustment from survival mode to safe mode takes years, because it’s so easy to be paranoid about losing it all, but it’s worth it. Sending positive thoughts and enjoy your Snickers, man.
Oh man, thanks for the nice words. Thats very nice of you to say that!
I only say it because it’s true.
If it hadn’t been because your art inspired me, every time I saw it in the free newspaper, I probably would’ve never even noticed that book in the library. Dumpster diving was only the reason I was able to do my art when I hit rock bottom. It helped me get a shitty apartment and to feed myself until I was able to find opportunities that helped me get to where I am now. Had your art not crossed into my life, I’d probably be another dead hooker in 1998, rather than happily married with a house in the country and three cats in 2013.
Seriously, you have no idea how grateful I am to you, or how happy I am for this chapter of your life. I realize that you don’t know me, and I don’t know you. Yet, t I am glad that you were a part of my life thanks to your art. I have a feeling that I am not the only one who feels that way.